I’m finally getting around to thinking about fulfilling my New Year’s resolution to clean out my bedroom closet. It is one of those chores you plan to do at least once a year but never get around to it. This year I am bound and determined to do so. I know there are many things that I don’t use anymore and Goodwill or the Salvation Army would be happy to recycle them.
There are at least a dozen dress shirts I haven’t worn in years. It will be tough to pass them on because they are in pretty good shape, but I definitely need to downsize my wardrobe. They must go.
Three pairs of khaki pants (some people call them trousers) that don’t fit any more are hanging there. Plus, four or five really nice sweaters that I wore when I taught school. I don’t need them anymore.
There are also 30 wide ties from when I worked for a living. When I taught in an elementary school for a while, the ties had Disney and Sesame Street characters on them. When I taught in high school, my ties had images of great artists’ paintings. People don’t wear ties anymore and neither do I.
I won’t miss the five belts that I can’t get around my waist anymore, except for the one with the seahorses on it.
I have two, identical, double-breasted suits (one for when I was thinner and one for when I gained weight), one seersucker, one black for funerals, a grey pinstripe for when I wanted to look like a gangster, and a tan one for summer.
I haven’t worn a suit since I retired and besides, none of them fit now. I’ll keep the dark grey suit I bought a couple of years ago for when I pass away. I’ll want to look good in the casket.
An old Hawaiian shirt I haven’t worn since the seventies and a collection of sweatshirts, covered in oil paint, are hanging on hooks. They’re going. A bunch of frayed, flannel shirts that cost about $15 each when they were new (now they cost about $60 each) should go. The last time I tried to buy one online in my usual size the sleeves were too long, so I exchanged it for a smaller size. The sleeves were okay, but I couldn’t button it around the belly. I can’t figure out why. Maybe they make them in some foreign country where people are smaller.
I have six pairs of nice leather dress shoes. I haven’t worn leather dress shoes since I retired 12 years ago. They’ve been sitting idle in the closet all that time. I’ll polish up the best pair just in case I have to attend a formal event. Out the rest go to a charity.
There are many pairs of old sneakers. I don’t know why I’ve kept them. They’re dirty, worn and have holes in the soles. The Salvation Army wouldn’t want them so in the trash they go. Some still have laces. I’ll be sure to keep the laces. I’ll throw them in the shoe box at the bottom of the closet with all the other old laces I’ve saved. You never know when a lace might break, and it is good to have an assortment of spares to choose from.
I also have quite an assortment of ball caps hanging in the closet. I should get rid of the ones I don’t wear. The blue ones are now grey, and the red ones have faded to orange. A few have frayed brims. Frayed brims are in these days, so I’ll save one or two of them just to look cool.
I probably should save all six of my Patriots Super Bowl Champions caps. Do you think I should save my autographed Mac Jones jersey? It might be worth something someday. Naw, probably not.
Editor’s note: Mattapoisett resident Dick Morgado is an artist and retired newspaper columnist whose musings are, after some years, back in The Wanderer under the subtitle “Thoughts on ….” Morgado’s opinions have also appeared for many years in daily newspapers around Boston.
Thoughts on…
By Dick Morgado