Halloween draws near, and with that, Rochester Memorial School held their annual “Spooktacular” this past Saturday. Hosted by the school’s Parent-Teacher Organization (PTO), the event allowed students, both current and former, siblings, and local kids to come get in on some candy early.
Dinosaurs, Spiderman’s (spider… men?), witches, karate kids, fairies, wizards, Beetlejuice’s, princesses, and many, many others, descended on the RMS campus to wage a magical, epic battle over who could have the most fun and get some candy a week before Halloween!
Disclaimer: There was no real battle involved, but there was plenty of candy and other treats. Some food trucks, coffee and ice cream, also zoomed over. Tables were set up of various decorations: Candy Land, Jurassic Park (hence the dinos mentioned earlier), and even Brain Rot; more on that later. The tables were helmed by well-respected students, faculty, and parents. Sweets of all sorts were collected and taken to down the haunted trail through the woods, which also offered a scavenger hunt.
Finally, the kids could eat candy and use their internet-derived slang, courtesy of Kai Cenat and CaseOh. Here is all I learned from my exposure:
The first turn off Ohio Ave. and onto Skibidi Lane, we left the NPC’s at home and got back to RMS for a Spooktacular time. Bet. No cap, candy’s bussin’. Some showed up to rizz up the huzz, but most showed up to mog their fits. Most slayed, but they all ate. Vice Principal West’s aura was wild bro. Weird flex wearing sandals, but mad drip tho. Ws in the chat for the PTO. Cooked hard on this one. I’m sorry for this. It’s giving cringe. It’s total brain rot.
Now that every child in a square mile has cringed from these words being written, a job well done. An adult using Gen Alpha slang; truly the scariest thing imaginable this Halloween.
The event was a great success. No one left without a smile or without some sweet treats.
By Sam Bishop