I’ve spent most of my life in the Tri-Town, bumping between burrows in Rochester, a sandy beach hole in Marion, or in The Wanderer’s office in Mattapoisett (don’t tell my boss I live there). I spend my days drinking iced coffee, walking the streets in search of cool goings-on, or looking for myself in pages of The Wanderer. For some reason, last week, I got the itch to travel.
I packed up all my belongings and put them in my duffle bag. Some snacks (mostly ants and cheese crackers), my Red Sox hat, the latest edition of The Wanderer (not product placement, I did bring it with me), and boarded one bus of many on my long trip south.
From the moment I stepped off the bus 14 hours later (public transport in the country needs some help), I knew I was in for an adventure – and a sweat! Did the bus dump me off in a bowl of hot soup? I was too busy fanning myself with a map of the National Mall to figure out where to go and get a reprieve from the heat. I guess the swamp hasn’t been drained yet. So, I pressed on!
I began by walking towards what resembled that thing on the back of a penny. It was! Squinting up at Abe’s enormous stone face, I decided to take a selfie. I also stayed under the shade with him for a moment, or ten, to get away from the blistering heat.
From there, I trotted down the Mall, occasionally stopping to take a sip of the reflecting pond. I did get an iced coffee here, but it just wasn’t the same. It didn’t help that all the ice melted after about 30 seconds.
I ran into the Air and Space Museum, where I was told I apparently mistook a moon rock for a termite mound. It won’t happen again! I also saw a ton of planes, old and new. How did the Wright brothers get that thing off the ground?
In another embarrassment, I was shushed in the Library of Congress. I only Whispered “way too loudly” how nice the carpet felt under my claws. It’s true! It was marvelous and may I just add, again, the air conditioning is marvelous and necessary there. The books from Jefferson’s personal collection would surely have melted otherwise.
It was all a lot to take in, and I really didn’t have the time to take it in since every moment spent looking up at the huge white buildings and monuments was also spent under the brutal yellow sun. The Capitol did make me wonder how anyone got anything done in a building so fancy. Nearby, some people wearing blue buttons were near some others wearing red buttons. They were trying to talk to me about Medicaid this and immigration that. Unfortunately for them, they do not have my vote. I am I staunch voter of the unrepresented, single-issue AFAP, or Aardvarks for America Party. Passing some protests near the white house I told both sides to great applause “If I ran this country, there’d be a national holiday for naps.”
The Washington Monument made me dizzy just looking up at it at night. I finally realized it was time to go home. After a long, sticky day and many, many miles walked, I can say confidently it was a great visit but next time, I’m going in October.
By The Aardvark