Rochester’s Conservation Commission Tuesday continued its review of two large projects until November 21 to give the town’s Planning Board time to review both plans first.

            JPF Development is seeking approval of a Notice of Intent to build a 15-acre, self-storage facility at Kings Highway and Route 28 that will feature the construction of seven self-storage buildings and an office with associated paved, access drives, parking areas, utilities and a stormwater-management system, located within the 100-foot wetlands buffer zone.

            Bob Rogers of G.A.F. Engineering opened the public hearing by explaining that the site has a varied topography because of the work that has been done on the site over the years. He is proposing to build a system that will grade stormwater runoff to the south into three separate water infiltration systems. These will include one for the parking area alone and the largest one for the area of the self-storage buildings.

            Rogers added he is asking the Conservation Commission for a continuance in order to hear first what the Planning Board will say about the project at the petitioner’s meeting with that board on November 14. He said he needs at least until November 21 to see how that input may change the plan.

            Conservation Commission Chairman Chris Gerrior emphasized the need to schedule a site visit as part of its review of the plan. Rogers hesitated to schedule one so soon. He said he is still busy with his survey crew, and where they would want to take their walk is not yet clear enough. It was agreed to wait to schedule that walk until after November 14.

            BWC Snows Pond LLC’s Notice of Intent plan is to build a solar array on 12.55 acres of a 31-acre parcel at 0 Cushman Road, to include a 2.39 megawatt (direct current), single-access tracking photovoltaic array and associated battery-energy storage within the 100-foot wetlands buffer zone.

            Engineering consultant Andrew Hamel said currently the lot is a grass field with woods that will need to be partially cleared, and there is a stone wall that will need to be cut into to provide an access road. He, too, said his project is being reviewed by the Planning Board on November 14.

            Melanie Sherman Morrison complained that she is such a close neighbor that she will have to constantly look at this solar array once it is erected. She wanted to know how close the array operations will come to her property and the wetlands near her and what will happen to stormwater runoff.

            Hamel said the array operations will stop 180 feet away from the area that concerns her, and that there will be no additional runoff caused by the project. Gerrior encouraged her to continue providing input when the Planning Board reviews the proposal on November 14.

            Here, too, the commissioners agreed to schedule a site visit via email with the membership, the petitioner and Conservation Agent Merilee Kelly and to continue the hearing until November 21.

            In other action, the commission approved a Notice of Intent to expand a back yard behind a single-family home at 31 Hiller Road by leveling the area with fill addition no closer than 25 feet from wetlands.

            Previously, homeowner Nathaniel Reece said he had already placed a silt fence and boulders where he wants his work to start. On November 7, he returned with a precise delineation of where the wetlands begin from a wetlands specialist. Those readings showed that his work will be no more than 35 to 40 feet from wetlands. The board will now work on the project’s Order of Conditions.

            The Rochester Conservation Commission scheduled its next meeting for Tuesday, November 21, at 7:00 pm at Town Hall, 1 Constitution Way.

Rochester Conservation Commission

By Michael J. DeCicco

What constitutes a bedroom was up for debate at the last two public meetings of the Marion Board of Health, and on November 2, Building Commissioner Bob Grillo asked for direction from the board on the matter.

            For instance, a home might be classified as a three-bedroom home but could be used as a five-bedroom home or more, putting more strain on the property’s septic system. Grillo said some applicants want answers before they begin design work on a home.

            Such an issue could lead to legal issues and a failed septic system, according to board members.

            Grillo said the definition of a bedroom should be a room with an egress or a window; a windowless room should only be considered a den or office. Board members did not debate that but debated the board’s policy on the matter.

            “Our main concern is the additional rooms,” Board of Health Chairman Dr. Ed Hoffer said. “If someone wishes to add rooms to an existing house without upgrading septic, they should sign a deed restriction.”

            Board member Albin Johnson had a different take. Citing the first homes built in Plymouth, he said there is a history of a homeowner’s right to use rooms as they wish.

            Johnson said there are legal avenues in place to protect homeowners and the environment if people buy the house for more bedrooms than what is advertised. Johnson said a realtor could lose his or her license for false advertisement.

            “I’m a minimalist,” he said. “You receive a certain bundle of rights when you purchase a piece of property. … The first registry of deeds was in Plymouth.”

            The board could not agree to a policy but directed Grillo that any windowless rooms resembling a bedroom should be considered an office.

            In other news, the board agreed that if a business selling tobacco sells the property, the tobacco license should be transferred over to the new ownership – if it is a similar business. Hoffer described it as a pro-business move.

            “It takes away the value of business,” Hoffer said, if officials do not allow a transfer.

            Not all tobacco businesses selling their property will sell it to a tobacco-sales entity, so it will still decrease the number of permits.

            In other business, Johnson took aim at an environmental report for the Marion Sanitary Landfill. He said the most recent report includes an extensive history. In recent years, monitoring wells across the street from the town’s Wastewater Treatment Plant at Benson Brook have not detected nitrogen, and the area is clean of pollutants, according to Johnson.

            Johnson and the board asked for clarification from engineers to guide the board with an interpretation of the report to inform a decision.

            “We are not polluting the environment,” Hoffer said.

            The next meeting of the Marion Board of Health was not announced upon adjournment.

Marion Board of Health

By Jeffrey D. Wagner

            I have always been fascinated with people who find solutions where there are no problems and I feel obliged to keep you, loyal reader, up to date on important issues, especially in areas of personal hygiene.

            You may have read that Charmin, a major manufacturer of toilet tissue, claims to have come up with a revolutionary improvement to their tissue rolls. After five years of exhaustive study and millions of dollars of expense retooling their machinery, they have decided to do away with the traditional square sheet. New improved wavy perforations now replace the traditional straight line of holes. They say this will “provide a better, smoother tear.”

            Well darn, thank you Charmin, because this is something I have been losing sleep over for some time and apparently so have enough frustrated users to warrant this important innovation. I confess I have not had any problem with ragged tears, but I am glad they continue to be on the cutting edge of toilet-paper technology. What’s next, “Glow in the Dark” toilet paper? Well yes, someone tried that, but it lasted less time than it took to flip a light switch.

            Proper hygiene is important, but you may be surprised to hear that Levi, the maker of blue jeans, has declared that their jeans only need to be washed every 10 wearings. Apparently, washing jeans once a week is the equivalent of 6,700 glasses of water, a serious consideration in reducing our carbon footprint. Who would have thought? I didn’t know washing jeans frequently was a problem, but Charles Bergh, CEO of Levi, has a solution … wash your jeans while taking a shower. There ya’ go!

            Another solution without a problem was the infamous “New Coke,” Coca Cola’s attempt to expand its market. When introduced, U.S. Senator David Prior called it “a meaningful moment in U.S. history.” It was a dismal failure because no one asked for it and no one cared. In an effort to keep up in the soft-drink marketplace, Mars, Inc. introduced “Life Savers” soda, but consumers labeled it liquid candy. No candy for you!

            Heinz, the catsup – or is it ketchup – people, produced “Squirt” blue-and green-colored condiments in a squeeze bottle, presumably for kids. The kids balked at the sight of it, and it was off the market in an instant. Other food companies that tried to create solutions for imaginary products where there was no clamoring for them include: Cheetos brand “Flamin’ Hot Lip Balm,” which not only burned lips but turned them orange; “Thirsty Dog” and “Thirsty Cat” beef-and fish-flavored water for pets; and Pizza Hut’s fold-over, calzone-like pizzas called “P-Zones.” Enough said about that name.

            Then in 1982, “Colgate Lasagna” was introduced, which was not only not appetizing but caused their toothpaste sales to plummet.

            Outside the realm of food, Bic, the pen makers, tried their hand at marketing perfume, and when that didn’t work, Bic ballpoints for women with a curvy shape in a variety of pastel colors were introduced. I’ll bet they were all men who dreamed up those products.

            Sometimes companies are ahead of their time. In 1999, Barbie personal computers were introduced. These were not toys, especially at the cost of $699. With the recent popularity of the Barbie movie – even the Red Sox had a Barbie Day at Fenway Park in September – they might have been a success. They were not.

            My favorite solution without a problem that failed was when Esso Oil spent millions of dollars researching, designing, redesigning and test-marketing a new brand identity, making sure the new name wouldn’t offend anyone around the world. As soon as the new name Exxon was released, wags started saying Exxon double-crossed their customers. They stuck it out, but they really should have saved their money; there was no problem with the old name.

            I think Charmin will have a big success with their innovative toilet-paper roll because their blue spokes-bear family is just so adorable. Don’t you agree?

Editor’s note: Mattapoisett resident Dick Morgado is an artist and retired newspaper columnist whose musings are, after some years, back in The Wanderer under the subtitle “Thoughts on ….” Morgado’s opinions have also appeared for many years in daily newspapers around Boston.

Thoughts on…

By Dick Morgado